incarnation

The Love of God (1 John 4:9-11)

In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. (1 John 4:9-11 )

During Advent, we talk a God who ‘put on flesh’ (incarnated) and took the penalty for our sins against Him upon himself (John 3:16-17). In many different places, the Bible is clear about why that happened: Jesus loves us (1 John 4:19; Romans 8:35-39).  

This is pretty straightforward, but to understand what it means that God loves us, we have to understand what love is. So let’s talk this morning about how we get past our filters and misunderstandings to better appreciate God’s love for us and better pass on God’s love to others. 

First, God’s love is supernatural. In the New Testament, the word for the love God has for us is the Greek word agape.[i]  In the Greek literature we have recovered, there is very little use of this word because it wasn’t a kind of love they valued that highly. In the New Testament, agape is used 320 times. The church took a seldom used Greek word, refined it, and introduced a radical new way of understanding love in light of God’s love for us.[ii] 

Agape love… is the most self-sacrificing love that there is.  This type of love is the love that God has for His own children. This type of love is what was displayed on the cross by Jesus Christ.  In John 3:16 it is written that “God so loved (agapao) the world that He gave His only begotten Son that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life.”[iii] 

"Unconditional love that is always giving; it is impossible to…be a taker. It devotes total commitment to seek [the other’s] highest best no matter how anyone may respond. This form of love is totally selfless and does not change whether the love given is returned or not."[iv]

Through common grace, all other forms of love are accessible to everyone. If I am reading Scripture correctly, no one can experience or give biblically defined agape love apart from the supernatural work of God (1 John 4:8 – everyone who agape loves is born of God, and knows God). So what does this look like?

“Jesus gave himself up for us. Jesus the Son, though equal with the Father, gave up his glory and took on our human nature (Philippians 2:5ff). But further, he willingly went to the cross and paid the penalty for our sins, removing our guilt and condemnation, so that we could be united with him (Romans 6:5) and take on his nature (2 Peter 1:4).  

He gave up his glory and power and became a servant. He died to his own interests and looked to our needs and interests instead (Romans 15:1-3). Jesus’ sacrificial service to us has brought us into a deep union with him and He with us.“ (Timothy Keller)

Second, we don’t have to earn it. God loves people: not because he needs us; not because we complete him; not because we are worthy, or lovable, or pure, or spiritually impressive; not because we please God or represent Him well. As one pastor noted,

While eros and philia thirst, agape simply overflows. This means – please stay with me here – that God’s love for us, in the end, has absolutely nothing to do with us. In other words, God does not love us because of who we are. Or because of what we do, or can do for God. Or because of what we say, or build, or accomplish, or change, or pray, or give, or profess, or believe… God simply loves us...[1]

·      When I pray regularly and passionately, God’s love does not fail. When I don’t, God’s love does not fail.

·      When I was chained in sin and when I was freed…

·      When I ignore Him and when I am enamored with Him…

·      When I am depressed or happy, anxious or at peace, self-loathing of self-loving…

·      When I pastor well and when I do it terribly...

·      When I am loved by others and despised by others…

If you ever think, “How can God possibly love me? I’m a disaster,” take heart: God specializes in saving disasters. God has never waited to love people until they were good enough to be loved. He loves people because He is God. And that gives me great hope indeed.

Third, God’s love will never be seen perfectly as it is passed on through people. None of us are Jesus. Because of the work of the Holy Spirit in surrendered lives, we are being transformed into his image, and we are becoming more and more like Christ. But we won’t nail it until we are in Heaven, so on this side of eternity we will fail to adequately represent what the love of Jesus looks like. 

We have to be ready for this. We will inevitably distort the genuine nature of godly love, and so will others. I don’t mean to be depressing; I’m just trying to be honest. With God’s help, we will often represent God’s love well, but we will never be perfect. 

That doesn’t bring me despair; that actually brings me hope. God’s love is better than even the best love that I have experienced when it comes to human love. God’s love is deeper, more faithful, more present, more life-changing, more holy and pure. Awesome. I love the glimpses I get from others, but I’m never going to mistake them for the fullness of the kind of love God has for me.

That gives me the freedom to see failure in others and not be disillusioned. It gives me the freedom to take people off a pedestal and let them be people instead of wishing they were perfect like God. And it gives me hope that people who do it so badly still bring such tremendous love into the world.  If there is this much good in a fallen Earth, I can’t imagine the goodness in the New Heaven and Earth.  

Fourth, God’s love helps us love others well.

·      “This is my command:  love (agape) each other.” (John 15:17) 

·      I am to love (agape) my wife like Christ loved (agape) the church (Ephesians 5:25)

·      “Anyone who does not love (agape) does not know God, because God is love (agape).” (1 John 4:8)

“We are thirsty, thirsty people. We long to know that we have worth, and value, and beauty. We ache to belong, to be included. But we run around our whole lives going after the sorts of love which will never completely satisfy this thirst. But in Christ, in the agape love of God, we find a love, the only love, which can fill us, and satisfy us so that we find ourselves, now overflowing, finally able to also love in a way that no longer seeks to take, but only to give.

Yes, Jesus wants you to love God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, all your strength. Jesus wants you to love your neighbors as you love yourself. He wants us to love with agape love. But if we try to love others, even God, like this without first realizing that we are already loved like this, all our efforts will only lead to despair. You see, agape love never flows from us. It only flows through us from the one who loves like we, on our own, never could.[v]

When we have trouble loving God or others well, we often focus on how to love better. That’s a good and necessary focus, but it’s the wrong starting point. We need to first refocus on the one who loves us. We need to experience and understand God’s love. 

If a person is not loving, John says, he or she does not know God (1 John 4:8). How will that individual become more loving, then? Can we grow in love by trying to love more? No, our attempts to love will only end in more frustration and less love. The solution, John implies, is to know God better. This is so simple that we miss it all the time: our means for becoming more loving is to know God better. (Marva J. Dawn, Truly the Community: Romans 12) 

Fifth, love is costly. Paul talks about Jesus taking on humanity and “becoming obedient unto death, even a death on the cross” (Philippians 2:8). David said that he would not give God a sacrifice that cost him nothing (1 Chronicles 21:24). 

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.”  C.S. Lewis

 Love will be costly because it will break our hearts.  It will force us to walk into the hard work of life when all we want to do is wrap ourselves carefully with hobbies and luxuries and silence and entertainment and selfishness.  

-       I cannot love my boys without a cost to myself: time, energy, priorities, attitudes, money… I can lock my heart in a coffin of selfishness, or I can be poured out for my boys.

-       I cannot love my wife without a cost to myself:  conversations about hard things; late nights and long days because of work, or household chores and juggling responsibilities; forgiveness. I can lock my heart in a coffin of selfishness, or I can be broken for my wife.

-       We cannot love our friends without a cost to ourselves.  Sometimes it’s messy (hurtful things said or done). We can lock our hearts in a coffin of selfishness, or we can be tender-hearted.

-       We cannot love our neighbors without a cost to ourselves. If my neighbor is far from Christ, then a lot of things they do, say and love will be far from Christ. Love – real love – will be costly as we get to know and understand, as we listen and love, as we seek to speak truth with love and grace, and we seek to represent Christ and speak the gospel with humility and boldness.

-       We cannot love the church, the body of Christ, without a cost.  We are not perfect people.  We will have to “bear each other’s burdens,” because we all bring burdens that other people will have to bear.  It is not a question of if.  It is a question of when.  Showing the kind of love to others that God showed to me demands something of my life.  Love is costly. Like Paul said, there will be times we are poured out like an offering (Philippians 2:17).

Sixth, God’s love is transformational. The cost is only part of the story of love, and by itself, sounds hard.  But what love offers – what Christ offers -  in exchange for that cost is transformation. 

Put off your old nature which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful lusts, and be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and put on the new nature, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness. (Ephesians 4:22-24)

It’s the exchange of beauty for ashes. 

-       The disciples – from petty, self-centered cowards to martyrs

-       Mary Magdelene – from demon possessed (7!) to eyewitness to the Resurrection

-       Paul - from persecutor to follower

Is there anything else that captures this transformative power of God’s love better than this commentary Paul offered on the church in Corinth:  “All these things you once were…” (1 Corinthians 6:11) he says after listing off the sins that had defined their lives.

When Jesus came, he offered LOVE, and in this love was the hope of transformation of the world that is also played out in individual lives all the time.  It wasn’t some generic “Heal the World” campaign, it was a deeply personal offer to transform you into something new, and keep transforming you until you are perfected in eternity. 

_________________________________________________________________________
[1] http://faithpresby.org/archives/sermons/written/files_4d2a59265361b.pdf

[i] The Greeks used a number a words for love:  there is one for erotic love (eros), one for friendship love (philia), one for family affection (storge) and one for self-sacrificial love (agape).

[ii] From Strong’s Concordance: agápē – properly, love which centers in moral preference…. In the NT, (agápē) typically refers to divine love (= what God prefers).

[iii] http://www.patheos.com/blogs/christiancrier/2014/05/02/what-is-agape-love-a-bible-study/

[iv] https://www.ezilon.com/articles/articles/7675/1/God-is-Agape-Love

[v] http://faithpresby.org/archives/sermons/written/files_4d2a59265361b.pdf

Make Incarnation Your Model

 A little girl, frightened by a storm, had trouble with her parents’ reminder that God was with her.  “I know that God is here, but I need someone in the room who has some skin!” This is, of course, the claim of Christianity. God showed up in skin.

“The Word became flesh and took up residence among us. We observed His glory, the glory as the One and Only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth.” (John 1:14) 

“Without question, this is the great mystery of our faith: Christ was revealed in a human body and vindicated by the Spirit. He was seen by angels and announced to the nations. He was believed in throughout the world and taken to heaven in glory.” (1 Timothy 3:16)

 So let’s talk today about incarnation; that is, “giving skin” to the presence of God in a way that carries on the legacy of Christ’s perfect embodiment.  This is why we are here, right? We are icons, image bearers, representatives, temples, the “body” of Christ.[1]  THIS IS WHO WE ARE. And because we are all that, we honor the Incarnate One who came to our world by living as an “incarnate church,”[2] a community humbly following the way of Jesus in everyday life so that we are “someone in the room who has skin” in the midst of life’s storms.  

We won’t do it perfectly; we can’t do it without the Holy Spirit empowering us. But…it’s our calling. It’s what we are made for. What follows can apply, I think to pretty much any situation: your family, friends, coworkers, fellow church members, those to whom we are trying to witness. 

 

GO

“In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death— even death on a cross!” (Philippians 2: 5-8)

God didn't wait for us to come to Him. He came to us.  We have a Great Commission: we have to go to where others are instead of wait for them to come to us. We often think of ‘going’ in a cross-cultural context. When we go to places not Traverse City, we eat new food, learn new languages, and celebrate with the different neighborhood customs (sometimes we do that right here in TC).  We live in that community in that context. Barring some sense in which we are asked to participate in something sinful, we are there to enter into their world, and that’s good and proper. 

We show people we care by engaging with and caring about them in their world as much as we can without compromise. This happens everywhere: from oversees to our homes, our church, our community.  It’s a universal principle.   

  • Want to talk to little kids effectively? Kneel when you speak.

  • Want to show your spouse you care? Plan a date he or she wants.  

  • Want to connect with your kids? Play music they like too while you are driving; play Hi Ho Cherrio for hours; build a fort out of a box.

  • Want to connect with someone who loves to fish, hike, or build stuff? Be ready to fish, hike or build stuff.

  • Want to have a good relationship with someone with a different religious or political worldview? Take the time to get to know their ‘mental community.’ 

 Enter their world.  It’s a relationship-building principle that not only honors others, but paves the way for a) genuine friendship and b) the message of the gospel. Once you go, the next step is to know, and this starts by listening.

 

LISTEN THOROUGHLY

One of the best ways to get to know people is to listen to them – their story, hopes, dreams, fears, even opinions.  Listening is a way of saying, “It’s not all about me. I want to know about you. I want to see who you are. You matter.”  This does not always come easily. Try this checklist:

1)   I make a great effort to understand other people’s experiences.

2)   When people are angry, I can listen without reflecting their anger. 

3)   People freely share with me because they know I listen well.

4)   I learn from nonverbal cues, body language, and tone of voice. 

5)   I am able to show sympathy and empathy.

6)   I ask for clarification about how words are used and what emotion I am sensing rather than filling in the blanks. 

7)   I don’t wait impatiently to make my point or have my turn.

8)   I can file stuff away to think or learn more about rather than feeling like I have to address it right now.

9)   I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt rather than read the worst possibilities into what I don’t understand. 

10) I don’t speak when I should be listening. [3]

Listening well is a key starting point in incarnation. We listen to understand and value the image of God in other people. They have worth simply as people.  

“Being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person, they are almost indistinguishable.” – David Augsburger

 Now… it might be that what you hear is appalling. It might be obnoxious. It might lead you to mutter, “Get thee behind me, Satan!” It might just break your heart. Keep in mind that the LISTENING is not the same as:

  • Approving

  • Enabling

  • Applauding

  • Excusing 

Listening is an act of knowing.  And from that knowing, we respond. 

SPEAK CAREFULLY 

Once you have listened, there are some ways to respond that, once again, a) honor the image bearer, b) hopefully build relationship, and c) build a relationship on the foundations of gospel.[4] 

Reflect: “I think I hear you saying…” This is a call to accuracy and clarity.  It stops us from assuming, from reading between the lines, from filtering what someone ways so we hear what we wanted to hear.  We can hear even the hardest things without getting upset if our first goal is to reflect: “I think I hear you saying that…”

1.       “… my faith is foolish, and Christianity is hogwash.”

2.       “…I am aloof and stand-offish when I interact with people.”

3.       “…Christians hate the sin and the sinner.”

4.       “…bacon is not tasty.”[5]

 Validate:  I mean this like validating a parking lot ticket: you give a stamp that proves you were present with that person. This can happen in a number of ways. ‘I hear you… I think I understand… Based on what you have said, I can understand why you feel that way... It sounds like you have been through a lot.”  Validating for someone that they have been heard is not the same as approving or agreeing with everything they have told you. It’s simply an acknowledgment that they have been heard, you have attempted to understand, and maybe even that their response makes sense in that circumstance/ time/place – which is still different from applauding it.  “Considering your experiences…”

1.       “…I can see why it would be easy to think that about Christianity.”

2.       “… I can see why I appear that way at times.”

3.       “… No wonder you feel like it’s not possible to separate sin from the sinner.”

4.       “… your taste buds appear to have been terribly compromised.”

 Explore: “I have some follow up questions.”

1.     “What do you think about Jesus himself? What is it you find compelling about the life you have chosen?  Are you telling me this because you just want me to know, or you want me to engage with you?

2.     “What specifically can I do to make sure I don’t come across that way?”

3.     “When you read about Jesus, does he seem to balance these things, or does he seem hateful too? Do you think I hate sinners?  

4.     “Did a pig bite you at one time? Were you frightened by Porky Pig?”

 Engage:

No matter what approach is needed, our desire for those around ought to be that every conversation is characterized by speaking and learning God’s truth, and displaying God’s grace through our words and actions.   

  1.  “I think there is another way of looking at faith that is more accurate and healthy than the picture you were given.”

  2.  “I appreciate you giving me your honest assessment. I will see if I can get some feedback from others as well.” 

  3. “I have found that people love me even when they don’t love everything about me. That’s what Jesus did for me. I try to pass that on.”

  4. “Have you tried bacon with bacon? Because they go together well.”

 The journey might look different in each relationship, but the goal is the same.  We are praying for the wisdom to be as humble as we should be,[6] bold as we need to be, as kind as we can be for the sake of moving together further and higher into the Kingdom of God. 

What we are praying for is the ability to MATCH OUR MISSION TO THE MOMENT. When I was coaching, I learned that different people respond to different kinds of motivation (shocking insight, I know). Some players flourished when I encouraged them out of failure (big hug during a time out); others flourished when I got in their face (big hug after the game). 

With God’s help, knowing  others will help us to know when to do and say what. Parents, you know how it is with kids. They are different. One kid didn’t respond until you were all up in their business; the other one melted down when you looked a little but unhappy. The longer we know our spouse, the better (hopefully) we get at when to do and say what. There is an art to matching our engagement to the person. 

This is one reason we are focusing right now as a church on creating ways to just spend time together, from small groups to affinity groups to potlucks.  If we are present and invested in people in the moment, we build a track record of knowledge and experience that God uses to prepare us for the deep moments of relationship. 

The Holy Spirit inspires, of course; many of you have shared stories of this in Message+ over the years. God gives inspiration.  Here’s a both/and: the Holy Spirit also leads us into wisdom through practical experience and relationship.

All relationships are built in a context of experiences and people.  If we have taken the time to know the person, the place, the background, the culture, then as Christ moves us and the Holy Spirit gives us wisdom, we can most effectively match our messages (through word and deed) to moments. 

This helps us more fully model the incarnational love of Christ to our family, our church, our city. Because Christ entered our world, we enter into the world of others without compromise to represent Christ with care and confidence so the glory of His redemption is clear. 

I want to close with the broader context of the verses I quoted earlier from Philippians 2. You will see that the example of Jesus’ incarnation is situated right in the middle of a discussion on what modeling incarnation looks like in the church.  Since modeling incarnation was our focus this morning, it seems like a fitting close.

Philippians 2 If you find any comfort from being in the Anointed, if His love brings you some encouragement, if you experience true companionship with the Spirit, if His tenderness and mercy fill your heart; then, brothers and sisters, 2 here is one thing that would complete my joy:

Come together as one in mind and spirit and purpose, sharing in the same love. 3 Don’t let selfishness and prideful agendas take over. Embrace true humility, and lift your heads to extend love to others. 4 Get beyond yourselves and protecting your own interests; be sincere, and secure your neighbors’ interests first.5 In other words, adopt the mind-set of Jesus the Anointed. Live with His attitude in your hearts. Remember:

6 Though He was in the form of God, He chose not to cling to equality with God; 7 But He poured Himself out to fill a vessel brand new; a servant in form and a man indeed.
The very likeness of humanity, 8 He humbled Himself, obedient to death — a merciless death on the cross! 9 So God raised Him up to the highest place and gave Him the name above all. 10 So when His name is called, every knee will bow, in heaven, on earth, and below. 11 And every tongue will confess  “Jesus, the Anointed One, is Lord,”  to the glory of God our Father!

 12 So now, my beloved, obey as you have always done, not only when I am with you, but even more so when I can’t be. Continue to work out your salvation, with great fear and trembling.

  •  labor; work it down to the end point, bring it to its right conclusion[7]’

  • Carry to completion what is begun,”[8] or “carry into effect.”[9]

  • “Watchful, loving, reverent consistency, for his Lord’s sake.”[10]

  •  "Salvation" is "worked in" (Php 2:13; Eph 1:11) believers by the Spirit, who enables them through faith to be justified once for all; but it needs, as a progressive work, to be "worked out" by obedience, through the help of the same Spirit, unto perfection (2Pe 1:5-8).[11]

13 God is energizing you so that you will desire and do what always pleases Him.

14 Do all things without complaining or bickering with each other, 15 so you will be found innocent and blameless; you are God’s children called to live without a single stain on your reputations among this perverted and crooked generation. Shine like stars across the land. 16 Cling to the word of life so that on the day of judgment when the Anointed One returns I may have reason to rejoice, because it will be plain that I didn’t turn from His mission nor did I work in vain.


_______________________________________________________________________

[1] 1 Corinthians 12; Ephesians 3-4; Colossians 1

[2] “We are the body,” Paul says. We are a new and ongoing kind of incarnation – clearly different from Jesus (anyone here divine?) but nonetheless participatory in the representation of God on God’s behalf.

1)    [3] Why would we talk too much? Maybe…. 

·       Love? Because we love them, there is soooo much truth they need to hear. There are times, however, when great intentions can have misplaced application.

·       Nervousness?  We control the conversation or change to a more comfortable topic because we don’t want tension inside us or between us to escalate. (This can feel like peacemaking, when it’s peacekeeping). 

·       Narcissism?  We genuinely think anything we have to say is of utmost importance; “My speaking is a much better use of our time! Have you not heard my thoughts!!!”

·       Lack of Faith? Maybe there are times the Holy Spirit wants us to be quiet even though something is begging to be said. Do we trust that God can do work even if we don’t get all the words out in the timing we think we should?

[4]  I am assuming a conversation in which it is not overwhelmingly clear there is something terrible going on, btw. There is a time and place for OT prophet-style unleashing; Jesus himself had some blunt things to say in public to those who were ‘making disciples of hell.’[4]  That involves people Proverbs would call “Fools”. Those are not my focus today. We can talk about that more in Message+ if you wish.

[5] These are all reflections I have offered at some point. Even the bacon one.

[6] An honest look inside shows us that we are more broken than we feared, but God is more powerful than we imagined.  As we understand brokenness and then grace, we know who we are and it illuminates the goodness of God.  Grace, compassion, truth and humility flow from us as we desire for others to see Christ as we have seen him. 

[7] HELPS Word Studies

[8] Ellicott’s Commentary For English Readers

[9] Expositor’s Greek Testament

[10] Cambridge Bible For Schools And Colleges

[11] Jameison-Fausset-Brown Bible Commentary